All Work From Jack Monroe

Topless Skateboarding

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 00:30:29 -0800

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Commentary:

I was watching Howard Stern the other night and he had on a topless golf team as his guests. That got me pondering: what other sports out there have been made topless as well? I've witnessed topless horseback riding, topless swimming and even topless skydiving...but they don't seem like enough to me. There should be more outlets for unclothed athleticism; it's quite underrated.

You Chucky Bastard. . Movie Review . Child's Play V. Seed of Chucky

Mon, 07 Mar 2005 23:00:14 -0800

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Other:

Having graduated with a degree in film studies, it's no surprise that a great deal of my free time is spent immersed in the world of cinema. Simply put: I love movies. I love watching them. I love talking about them. My devotion to the medium has even gone so far as to disrupt my love life. I'm not joking. A girl once dumped me because I kept on quoting Dumb and Dumber when we were together. I guess she just couldn't appreciate hearing the most annoying sound in the world over and over again. Go figure.

Men. Unfit To Be Fit.

Sat, 23 Apr 2005 19:35:16 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under General:

Guess what just opened in a mall down the street from me: a gym filled with nothing but women as far as the eye can see. Girls in spandex, pumping up and down on machines, getting sweaty and grunting loudly. Ladies panting as they play with exercise balls and rub their wet, dripping bodies off with greasy dishtowels. Mmmm. Sometimes, when I imagine it, I can't help but salivate. Seems like my kind of place. All right. I'm sold. Where do I sign up?

PUSHING WEIGHT. The Life and Times of a Fat Skateboarder

Thu, 05 May 2005 17:47:26 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under General:

Am I a goddamn lardass? Sometimes I'll just stand in front of the mirror, naked, examining my body in an attempt to determine the answer to that very question. And, you know what? I honestly can't tell. It's impossible for me to be objective; I'm so close to the item being judged that I can't get into the third person perspective. Kind of like when you draw a painting in art class and can't figure out if it's good or not, so you have to ask some random guy walking by for a second opinion. The whole matter is very frustrating.

My Dog Is Drug Free And Proud

Wed, 11 May 2005 21:59:42 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Parody/Satire:

It's no secret that I smoke a lot of marijuana. At this point, it's looking like I'll be stoned for the rest of my life. It just feels so good; I don't want to stop. I love it. But, no matter how tremendous it may be, there's one thing that can always blow my high: my dog.

I Am The Great White Black Panther

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 19:03:01 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under General:

There's something I never told you guys about me: I fucking hate cops.

EXTRA GNAR. THE STRUGGLE FOR SKATEBOARDING'S TRUE PORTRAYAL

Fri, 10 Jun 2005 02:49:03 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Commentary:

Do you ever get angry at the way skateboarding's portrayed in movies and television? I do. I throw my popcorn at the screen every time some idiot wearing a rollerblading helmet and JNCO pants screams, "Cowabunga!" before busting eight feet of air off of a car hood. After walking out of so many theaters, I've come to realize that successful renderings of our lifestyle get lost in the sea of grandeur and cheesiness that is Hollywood. Save perhaps the odd documentary here and there, sometimes it feels like the skate videos we create are the only way to capture a true representation of ourselves on celluloid. Thus, one day not long ago, I set out to make a change in the movie industry.

THE MADD WRITER

Fri, 01 Jul 2005 04:33:49 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under General:

Yo, let me tell y'all motherfuckers something for a second. Let me tell y'all something. You wanna know why I'm mad? I'ma tell you why I'm mad. This website is fucked up, yo. It's outta control and it ain't treating me right. This is some bullshit, straight up. And, you know what? I'm pissed. I'm pissed the hell off.

01.19.05

Fri, 20 Jan 2006 14:26:29 -0800

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Other:

What I am and am not into right now.

02.11.06

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 17:24:23 -0800

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Other:

This is a list of what Jack is and isn't into at this very moment

DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK

Wed, 17 May 2006 14:08:21 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under General:

Forget about it, pal. Go Home!

Chasey Loves Rocco

Sat, 16 Sep 2006 22:37:51 -0700

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Other:

She comes in, they kiss, he takes her shirt off and yada, yada, yada...

HELLCARE

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 18:27:37 -0800

Jack Monroe published a new piece under Commentary:

WELCOME TO HELLCARE!