the heel press

"come on Carmen get back in the car, your being ridiculous" there William goes again judging, and he's the

one being ridiculous.  I have a good mind to keep walking, but I wont face it town is a long way off. And I am

not about to walk another step let alone forty miles.

Why do I argue with him?  I just don't know some times. You would think that at forty years old I'd know how

to wait on God and not William. William is my ex husband. Married fifteen long years, divorced all of sixty

minutes. Well thats how long its been since the papers were served to him. I already knew I filed them.

It wasn't any easy thing no  really I kept the count of years in my head then I finally did it. Funny it didn't feel

like I thought it would. I guess it never does.

Now what was really funny was William rushing over to the house, the look on his face, I tell you that look. I

stood there on the other side of the screen and said "what is wrong with you?" Good thing I was already

headed out the door, or I'd have to invite him in. Since when did he need an invitation. But I walked out the

door past him. Closed locked both door and screen door and walked to the bus stop. Just like that I walked

past that man. Believe me that was a hard thing to do. Seventeen years of knowing a man and find out you

were wrong.

So there we sat at the bus stop him with his papers and me with a grin. "Carmen we need to talk" The way

he held on to those papers I thought they would tear. "About what ? I don't see a need to talk" I said looking

down the road for the bus. The sun sat in the middle of the sky as illusions floated around like glass mirrors.

"I'll give you a ride to town" William stammered out as he headed to get his car.  So off we went and now

here we are in the middle of the California desert .

"I know you love me, I'll get us back together" William said in his deepest sexy tone he could find. I just

climbed back into the car and read my bible. When we reached town I got out the car and walked to the

office. "Your early" Tim said looking up from talking to a customer. "got a ride in" I nearly whispered as I

walked to the back room grabbed files and sat at my desk.  Pam and Matthew were just coming in as Tim

closed the deal with the customer. We all sat for our morning meeting. I don't know how long William had

been standing st the window, but it scared me when I looked up.

And from the reaction of everyone else in the room it caught us all off gaurd.  But I went right on like I never 

saw him.  But there William would stand would stand waving his hands at me then turn around and walk off.

By the end of the day he must have called eleven times and stood in front of that window five more times.

Good thing he got served on his day off. Pam went to the same church I attended a few blocks from our

gated community. And Tim and Matthew attended church here in town.

But each of them knew William from high school. So ity bothered them for him to treated the way I did him.

But I hadn't did him any way, he did it to himself. We were seperated, William chose to be seperated, Now

come on he decided he didn't want our marriage any more so I thought I'd help him out. Now he says he

never thought I'd do this to him. Even said I'd won he wanted me back. Obviously he hadn't read the word of

God.

As I left going to the bus stop William drove a long side of me tapping the horn as I ignored him. and without

warning he slammed on the breaks jumping out cutting me off by standing in front of me with arms full of

flowers and cany. I took the flowers and passed on the candy. "Please ride back home with me" his deep

 voice sang as he leaned to whisper in my left ear. I accepted, its funny we actually talked and for the first

time in years he listened.  The ride home even seemed shorter. And for the first time in a long time William

smiled.

That was two days ago now today we are going to church, talking about Christain counseling and even

thinking of jumping that broom again. I don't know what put us where we split up. But prayer does change

things. No one is perfect but God is.  So I know as long as we keep our hands in His we'll be alright.