the heel press

Since this week marks the fourth anniversary of a fundraising event I started my freshman year of college, I thought ...

Dear SUBWAY, Yesterday, Michel (my co-worker) and I decided to spend our lunch break eating at one of your restaur...

When I walked into the classroom today, I expected to take my final exam in peace. I stayed up all night studying fo...

Dear Toyota, I've been doing a lot of research on your new line of Prius hybrid vehicles. I respect the Prius...

A Living Atrocity (a satire of 1999) "Oh say can you see by dawn's early light" -Francis Scott Key &n...

The below piece is a parody of my roomate's med school application essay.  I actually only read the first f...

Officials at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba have confirmed reports that world famous street rat Aladdin has been taken into cus...

Apple (NASDAQ: AAPL) today announced plans for a KKK Special Edition iPod as part of a new alliance between Apple and...

Vaqueros center fielder Juan Castro got more than he bargained for yesterday when he climbed over the fence to rob op...

SPRINGFIELD, Illinois - In a groundbreaking move that many minority activists have hailed as long overdue, the newest...

I have had movie sex with dozens of A-list celebrities. I have been in countless shower scenes with entertainers and...

In the past decade, rap and hip-hop culture have slowly begun infiltrating virtually every facet of our lives. Wheth...

I gracefully sip on my Pinot Grigio, turning to her wide-eyed as I adjust myself in the seat, barely containing my o...

Seeking to build on the popularity of their NBA live series, EA Sports announced today that they have completed their...

The clerk showed me the way in. "This way to your office", he said with a tinge of French tongue. I trailed him, sh...

Soaring high, the rocket jettisoned its cargo. The cargo, a can of escargot, fell harmlessly to the ground. The roc...

MINNEAPOLIS, Minnesota â€" Last week in a freak accident in the General Mills factory in Minneapolis, Minnesota, the ...

Following a dim, rainy Winter here in Berkeley, an amazing thing has happened: Spring has sprung. The clouds are gon...

America's obsession with dieting plunged deeper into the depths of pathetic on Sunday when Orange County Catholics fi...

In middle school I was just a scrawny little Asian kid who was bussed to high school after 7th period for advanced ma...